mum2be.ie - Pregnancy and Baby Forums

[lainey84]

This is a general question........... my partner is working full time monday to friday as well as some music commitments at weekend like lessons and work ..... now the thing is he has practices etc and other responsibilities but I am finding it hard to get me time- the only proper time I get is saturday afternoon
However, I end up doing housework I cannot get done with litte man around on saturday (which is meant to be me-time).

Its feels to me like he has a load of time to have his outside interests- -but I am stuck at home with little man and housework all the time.


Now, there is a load of small things that need to be done every day around house which I don't mind doing but you get a bit sick of it. My other half is wrecked from doing night feeds so it looks like I will be taking over the majority of the night shifts on working days ( so thats 6 days a week) too. I am just trying to work a way to balance routines- i know my oh is working hard but I need a break too. The only time I get to myself during the week is if I am going to gp.

My question is how much do you think your partner should help around house?? And how did ye manage night feeds when one of ye is working full-time.

Sorry if my post makes no sense

[soexcited]

Id say if he is doing the night feeds and working full time you can expect much else from him... Is there no1 near you that could pop in for an hour every so often to let you have a nice bath or something, a parent? sister?
As for household things I sometimes make a list for oh and he makes his way through it when he can. Id say now you've just had a long 6 weeks of all this and could do with a good few hours to yourself..
Are you planning on going back to work in a few months?

[babyL]

to be honest hunni, since your husband is working full time you cant really expect more than he is doing, i know its hard going but you will get used to it having to deal with house work and a baby at same time, i was a single mum when i had my first daughter and had no help at night at all, i just had to get myself into a routine that when baby slept or was in lying off in her seat id get my work done and when she went to bed at night i did what ever was left to do. Plus i made it my business to get out and about once a day for a walk or go to mother and toddler group, i know its hard hunni but i promise it'll get easier! Oh plus make sure you give baby time to lay in basket or seat and just kick away and amuse his self it'll give you time to get something done plus get baby used to not relying on mammy to sit and play with him all day long.

[soexcited]

to be honest hunni, since your husband is working full time you cant really expect more than he is doing, i know its hard going but you will get used to it having to deal with house work and a baby at same time, i was a single mum when i had my first daughter and had no help at night at all, i just had to get myself into a routine that when baby slept or was in lying off in her seat id get my work done and when she went to bed at night i did what ever was left to do. Plus i made it my business to get out and about once a day for a walk or go to mother and toddler group, i know its hard hunni but i promise it'll get easier! Oh plus make sure you give baby time to lay in basket or seat and just kick away and amuse his self it'll give you time to get something done plus get baby used to not relying on mammy to sit and play with him all day long.

Oh a mummy+baby group... thats a great idea!

[mom2djp]

we used to do the hubby would do late feed id do early feed, now i would do most of the early feeds, and hubby would do last one at night.

as for the house work, he does the cooking, i do the cleaning, now its mostly when his back home from work i go around and give the place a little clean.

hun if you want to get out of the house, meet some else in the same boat, give a pm, and we can meet up if you want, even for a coffee cas a few hours out of the house does wonders for your head.

[lainey84]

Well I have no bother doing housework. It was more of a general question how much should your partner help. I am doing nights now mostly as well as days so it's long n tiring but I think my body is used to sleep deprivation at this stage. I actually like cleaning I am a Monica..... I am thinking of joining baby group after Xmas alright n taking on few classes in community centre to get me time.
Regarding work, I do not know will I go back full time, maybe part time or a bit of if
Contracting if possible

@mum2djp I will take you up on that offer will drop you a pm when I am on laptop.

Fingers crossed he will settle soon so I won't be totally worn out....