mum2be.ie

[mamaw]

Hello everyone

I'm new to this site (saw the link on another site), have been reading for a little while and to be honest was a little nervous about signing up. I know this is one of my first posts but hoped ye might be able to share your opinions.

I'm newly engaged and have been with my boyfriend for nearly 6yrs. We have set our wedding date for the end of 2013. We have spoken over the last couple of weeks about the possibility of having a baby before we get married. We thought we'd give ourselves a time window for conception and kinda of have a see what happens attitude. Do you think we are crazy planning this while planning a wedding (bare in mind, I have virtually everything weddingwise organised)? should we wait until after the wedding? Would it be too much pressure?

Thanks in advance and to all

[Torrach]

Honestly, yes, I do think it'd be too much pressure. Just got married myself about 7 months ago and was worried about getting pregnant cos I didn't want it to mess up my plans. Having said that, other missies got pregnant when their wedding wasa planned too and they are really happy about it. I just think, cos you have the choice, you might want to wait till about 4 months b4 your wedding. That way, if you do get pregnant, it won't interfere with your plans. Can you bring the wedding forward at all? Then you could start right away without having to worry about it??

[mamaw]

Thanks for your reply Torrach. Really appreciate your opinion. Bringing the wedding forward isn't really an option. We thought maybe stop using protection from March to May, see what happens and that way, if we did conceive, the baby would be born nine months before the wedding at the latest. I've had gynae issues in the past and i guess I'm afraid that maybe if I wait and had problems, I'd wonder what if we hadn't waited. It's a lot to think about I guess.

Would love to hear from mums that had there baby's before there wedding or are expecting in the run up to their wedding.

[Torrach]

Aw, I hear ya!! I'm the same. I have so many gynae probs working against me, that sometimes I lose count of what they are. Myself and DH weren't really wanting to start ttc for another year or so but like yourself, when I did the maths on it, I was like, we need to start soon as if I conceive this month, it'll be born around my 30th birthday but I have a feeling it'll be a long road cos of the issues I've had, am having. They say you only regreat the things you don't do. I suppose I wasn't really thinking about when your wedding was. I'm sure having 9 months to prepare yourself for the wedding wouldn't be too bad, would it? But is that saying that you get preggers straight away only?

[babyL]

I say start trying now and give yourself a good few months to see what happens! I'm getting married in December this year and due baby 1st of may so my little man will be 7 months when we get married! Now we didn't plan it that way but are over the moon he's on the way now! We had planned to start ttc on honeymoon but who says I would have got pregnant then! I wouldn't wait hunni, my bf has been ttc for 3 years now and is heartbroken it didn't happen straight away and test have come back that she is grand and so is her oh! You just never know what the future holds!

Best of luck on what ever you decide hunni loads of to you

[mamaw]

Thanks ladies, ye are talking along the same lines as I am thinking. When it comes to the wedding, all the big things are done so i imagine there shouldn't be a huge amount of pressure. We thought we might start ttc from end of march til end of may and just see what happens. Really don't want to get stressed about it as that never does anyone any good.

Again thanks girls, it's nice to "talk" to women about things

[MrsEL10]

I think don't wait. You never know what is going to happen. We decided to wait until after the wedding and now have been trying for a year without anything happening. To be honest if I knew then what was going to happen I would have started trying a lot earlier and would have changed around wedding plans if I had to

[mamaw]

UPDATE!!!

SO since I started this thread back in January a lot has change. We changed our wedding plans. Basically we slashed our wedding guest list by 220 people and are now getting married in August of this year. All of this also means we are bringing our baby *plans* forward too. We go on honeymoon in the middle of Aust and are going to start trying for a baby then. I'm super excited by everything

[excitedmama]

Hi just seeing this now I was going to say dont wait!! I have a 5 month old and getting married in 6 weeks!!!!
Wishing you all the best have a great day and have fun trying for a baba xx

[MrsEL10]

Good luck with it all